DaVinci Code: Calm Down

Before I start two important news items:

-Racial Chameleon will be ready to ship in less than 2 weeks. Go to the store to pre-order.

-The long-awaited Gulman-Cauvin photos are up in the media-photos and the blog-photos section

Now on to what promises to be one of the biggest movies of the summer. The DaVinci Code is opening today and I couldn’t be more luke-warm excited. I thought the book was good, but like Harry Potter I simply read it because I did not want to be behind on a major pop culture phenomenon, in case there were jokes to tell. It was a decent book, but I have some major problems with both sides (my Catholic homies and my secular homies):

First for the Catholics:

-It is just a book.

-Some of those Opus Dei dudes are kind of crazy – see e.g. Robert Novack, formerly of CNN’s crossfire and full time angry penguin-looking fellow.

-If you can praise the Passion of the Christ (which I did) then you can’t hammer a book/movie that isn’t as favorable. Love thy neighbor’s movie as you love thine own. But do not covet thy neighbor’s movie, key distinction, especially if they are home movies meant only for persoanl viewing.

-Tom Hanks’ hair will guarantee less box office power

-Unnecessary and exagerrated measures (hunger strikes, boycotts, etc.) are absurd and only galvanize the people who think you are loony to begin with (see Passion of the Christ again)

And for the anti-Bible people:

– See the irony in reading a fictional book to discredit the New Testament. Even if you are not inclined to believe much or any of the Bible, two fictions do not make a fact. Tom Cruise is married to a woman. She gave birth to a baby. It does not make him straight.

-Of course some Christians and Catholics will be upset by the story. Boycotting is unnecessary and ridiculous, but if someone believes Jesus to be the Son of God, it will be a little alarming and jarring to think that before he was crucified he had to take Jesus Jr. to a soccer game. And the mother was a prostitute. Short of Julia Roberts, no one would really be confortable with that notion. Especially becasue that means Richard Gere would be playing Jesus and that is just weird.

– No one complained when Battlefield Earth came out and questioned its authenticity. Everyone was just fine listening to John Travolta talk about giant aliens coming to Earth thousands of years ago. In all fairness though, the Scientologists are the Pittsburg Pirates of religions, whereas Christianity is the New York Yankees – everyone hates the big dog.

So as you go to see the DaVinci Code just remember, both sides, that it is just a movie and that we should be concerned about far more pressing matters. Taylor or McPhee in American Idol. Cauvin out.

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