The kiss of death in comedy?

The last week has been a good one for me in terms of opportunity. I got an audition in Columbus, Ohio for national feature work and last night I had a show at Caroline’s with Eddie Brill (Letterman booker) hosting.

March 6 – Columbus Funny Bone

I arrived in C-Bus and went right to the Easton Mall, a mall that I am very familiar with. It is a classic American Mall. 500 stores, 800 places to eat tasty, fatty food (I enjoyed a hearty meal at the Cheesecake Factory) and 1000 15 year old girls dressed like music video whores. I had time to kill so I went to see a movie at the Easton AMC 30 plex. 30 theaters. If you have ever wondered, “Why would a theater need to play Norbit every 15 minutes?” Then your answer is, “So a lonely comedian can kill time before doing a set at a comedy club.”

Eventually I went to the show where I was slated for a 20 minute set. I went up first and did well. But I did not kill. My lack of experience in doing sets longer than 6-10 minutes, (Thanks NY Comedy Clubs!) and the fact that I was fu-king tired led to that result. The booker told me that I had really good material and was likeable on stage, but that I was missing an “it factor.” The sad thing was that based on my set I agreed. Oh well, see you next year Columbus.

March 13, 2007 Caroline’s on Broadway

So last night I had a set at Caroline’s. The show was hosted by Edie Brill, who books Letterman so I was eager to perform. I have done several sets at Caroline’s and have always gotten 10 minutes. So I prepped a tight 10 minute set. when I looked at the board I noticed that I was only getting 8 minutes. All of a sudden a Smurf with a halo appeared on my right shoulder and a red Smurf with a trident appeared on left shoulder:

Angel Smurf – It’s ok J-L, just cut two minutes and have a great set

Evil Smurf – FUUUUUUUU-K.

POOF!!!!

So I cut my bit about a hypothetical hook up with a racist girl on Spring Break and said – “perfect.”

Then I went on stage and got lit at 5 minutes, meaning I was only getting a 6 minute set. I wrapped it up at a tight 6 and was told by Eddie Brill that I had “really good material, but I rushed through my material a little too much.” I was actually excited about the compliment, but realized that once again there seemed to be something missing.

I have been told a lot that I was really good and oh so close, but never in comedy.

But I must admit I was a little peeved at Caroline’s (what I just said is the comedic equivalent of telling Michael Corleone to go fu-k himself). Cutting my time by 25-40% for 15-20 of my paying friends, not to mention the $40 I am paying for a tape is not that cool. It is like that old prison saying (that I just made up now): It’s ok if you fu-k me, but just protect me if someone else tries to fu-k me. Well, last night it felt like Caroline’s was running a prison train on me.

That said, I will be at Caroline’s next Tuesday for Round 2 of March Comedy Madness. I guess like Brooks in Shawshank I am not sure how to operate outside of that environment.