Adventures with my nephew and a month without comedy.

I spent this last weekend with my brother and his family in Washington D.C. It was pleasant and relaxing. And it also made me feel old because at 27 I have not technically outgrown the drooling at women dressed as 9 varieties of whore on Halloween but I was content to chill at home.

In the afternoon I accompanied my nephew to the annual neighborhood Halloween parade. He was supposed to go as a train, but the costume did not suit him and he went as Tigger (which he went as last year). A few parents said to him, “Oh look it’s Tigger,” and I had to inform them that they cannot refer to him as Tigger unless they are Tigers themselves. It was uncomfortable.

On Sunday I watched Munich with my brother on his new sweet plasma surround sound set up. All I kept thinking was terrorism is so much more exiting in surround sound. And I thought boy I would love a set up like this, but I guess I would need money and success first.

Then I went home on the world’s most crowded Amtrak ever. Many people ask why I don’t take the shuttle and I say because flying is unnatural and uncomfortable both from my knees’ perspective and my Richie Valens fear perspective. And if I died in a plane crash Esai Morales would not go running up a hill screaming RICHIEEEEEEE. Probably because he does not know me and La Bamba was just a movie.

So then I arrived home and realized that November was on the horizon and I had 0 shows scheduled. 3 and a half years of comedy. Writing good jokes, working on impersonations, trying to make contacts and I have exactly the same number of shows scheduled as I did in May 2003: the month before I ever went to an open mic. To highlight this I have begun to fill out my calendar with random crap that I will be doing during the month. They will at least be blog material and photo ops.

Maybe I should just run for office. Except with Barak Obama and even more so, Harold Ford Jr., the “black guys who are articulate and visually appealing to white people and may even tempt white people to vote for them” card is all full. Even as a politician I would be hacky. The hacky half-black politician now. Oh yeah, he went to Georgetown and his Dad is black, but Obama is smarter and Harold Ford has more piercing eyes. I am the Darko Milicic of possible half black politicians. With the first pick, Illinois selects Barak Obama, Second pick NY selects J-L Cauvin? (the Knicks do draft terribly) and third, Tennessee selects Harold Ford Jr.. If you do not know about the 2003 NBA draft – go look it up.

Well expect a lot of November bloggings ‘cause there ain’t much more going on.