Jeff Dunham Announces New Puppets For 2012!

Great news for the millions of Jeff Dunham fans – he has announced a new roster of puppets to satisfy his followers who thirst for new and cutting edge material.  Known for turning all white crowds into def jam audiences with his hilarious puppets like “Crotchety Old Guy,” “Purple Dude,” “Mexican Pepper,” and everyone’s favorite “Terrorist Skeleton,” (admittedly I have seen Dunham’s work, but have not paid much attention to the names) Dunham has decided to create five new characters for his 2012 tour.  Based on the core of Dunham’s wild success, which is producing mild humor through blandly prejudiced or stereotypical puppets, his new characters will continue his brand.  He will offer fresh material through his new voices that can only be categorized as “Diet Mencia.”  So look out in 2012 for the Dunham Fab Five:

Santorum – Dressed in his traditional sweater vest, Santorum is everyone’s favorite woman hating puppet.  He has been getting big laughs by telling crowds that he only performs comedy for the purposes of conception and that no one should go to college (applause line).  And nothing gets the crowd laughing more than when he throws tiny stones at Dunham during arguments.

Bachmann – After complaints from various comedy lobbying groups about Dunham only having one female puppet, Dunham has added a another female to the lineup. She wins the crowd over by asking if any men want objects in their butt because “that’s how we do it in the Bachmann home.” She also mocks Dunham for his belief that science is responsible for the microphone producing sound, much to the delight of the crowd.

Herman Cain – Wearing a pimp hat, Herman Cain is the Dunham puppet that can’t stop chatting it up with all the ladies in Dunham’s audiences.  He always kills crowds with his Dunham-penned catchphrases of “I loves white womens,” and “I got 9 inches for 9 ladies starting at 9 tonight!”

Nuge – armed with a guitar that fires bullets, Nuge is Dunham’s highest energy puppet since “Purple Dude.”  When Dunham insists that President Obama is not a Muslim, Nuge proudly declares that he will “leave the stage in a laundry hamper” if Dunham doesn’t recant. When Dunham gives in it usually gets a standing ovation.

The Ghost of Trayvon Martin – giving Terrorist Skeleton a run for his money as Dunham’s new closer, this puppet comes dressed in his traditional hoodie, holding a pack of skittles and iced-tea, both of which he tosses to a lucky fan during the set.  The Trayvon puppet gets Dunham’s crowds howling with laughter with lines like “The New Black Panthers are going to get you,” and “The last time I killed this bad I was running from neighborhood watch!”

So get those tickets now – as they will undoubtedly sell out.