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Not Their Brother’s Keeper – Black on Black Comedy…

I have written a few times on the experience (and pitfalls) of being an opening comedian.  When it comes to headliners there are those that like to have strong opening acts (the best example I can think of is how Seinfeld had Brian Regan open for him during a run on Broadway several years ago), those that like weak openers (these are the headliners who despite fame, or a loyal fan base, still cannot have a strong opener for fear that they will be crushed, even when it is unlikely), and those that don’t allow black comedians to open for them.

Yes, hopefully that third one startled you.

I learned about this phenomenon (but apparently not something that has just emerged in the last 12 months when I became aware of it) when an owner of a club wanted to use me as a test case (sort of a Plessy v. Ferguson of comedy) last year.  Knowing that I was half-black, but not very obvious to the untrained eye, he wondered if I could be acceptable despite a contract that specifically stated that there were to be no other black comedians on the lineup.  It never happened, but I have heard of at least one other fairly prominent black comedian who specifically requests no other black comedians on their lineup.  So 60 years ago I would have been trying to “pass” as white to drink at a water fountain, now it is a question of whether I can “pass” to open up for some self-hating brothers.  Sort of like a passive aggressive way of fulfilling Martin Luther King’s dream.

Now, mind you, this is not someone asking that a particular style of comedians is off limits (perhaps you don’t want a Def Jam style comedian because you don’t like that style, or think it would be redundant, or don’t think it would mesh with your show, but that would not preclude many other black comedians). These are black comedians who have achieved success and want to prevent other black comedians from sharing in it.  In some cases, if in front of a largely black crowd, they want to make sure no other comics get any of “their love” from “their people.”  In other cases, in whiter crowds, they want to make sure they get 100% of the “soul bounce” (the soul bounce is my term for the automatic love white crowds give a black comedian just for being black across much of this country).  Who knows how many examples there actually are, but if two relatively prominent comedians do it, that means comedy clubs are willing collectively to accept between 40 and 60 weeks of performances from comedians who are discriminating based solely on skin color.  And that is just assuming it is only two.

The fact that comedians who employ this blatant discrimination (these guys would have probably been African chiefs selling their people to slave traders centuries back) are still in demand and hired by clubs is just another example of the almighty buck triumphing over any sense of decency.  Kramer may have called a couple of black guys niggers, but I believe he is not 1/10th the piece of shit these comedians are.  But if they can make a club an extra $5,000 per weekend they perform so what if they are discriminating against and trying to hold down black comics (and the stories are never about titans like Dave Chappelle or Chris Rock – they’re about B Team players, which makes putting up with their bullsh*t even less pragmatic, if solely thinking from a business perspective)?  If a white comedian banned black comics from his shows there would be outrage, and simultaneously there would be anger if a black comic banned white comics from his shows, but there is no reaction from a black comic banning black comics?  It reminds me of the meeting in The Godfather where one of the Dons says to keep the drug trade in “the dark people – they’re animals anyway.  Let them lose their souls.”

The comedy business once again proves that it is already one step ahead.