It is fitting that I would be in my office on my last day of vacation, using this time to prep for my first day of work. That is what life sometimes comes to – you are just happy to come into your office not wearing a suit, unaware that the Man wins by me just showing up on your vacation.

But over vacation I have pondered several things. Here’s a sampling:

1) MEL GIBSON IS A GENIUS. By allegedly making ant-semitic comments, mel has put Hollywood in an awkward position. Agent Ari Emmanuel (the basis for Entourage’s Ari Gold) has called for a boycott of Mel’s new film Apocalypto. Now Apocolypto looks like a bag of crap (not Braveheart or Passion quality). But now, if it makes no money, it can be attributed to a boycott ordered by a jewish agent. Result: instead of saying Mel’s new movie sucks and no one saw it, Mel can say, “It would have made money, but Ari’s boycott ruined it. I guess Jews really do run Hollywood.” And if the boycott doesn’t work – potential cash money. Brilliant work Mr. Gibson.

2) YANKEES are good again. And like our sciene and engineering jobs, the Yanks have relied heavily on outsourcing their pitching to Asians. Thank you Chien-Ming Wang. And he is doing it at a fraction of the price of that lazy American Randy Johnson.

3) Speaking of outsourcing, according to Thomas Friedman’s THE WORLD IS FLAT, America is f–ked (at least by page 300). That has been my vacation reading (that and Flags of Our Fathers – a book about WWII).

4) The LA IMPROV has expressed interest in potentially booking me in the “near future” (see 2009) based on my CD Racial Chameleon. It may have to do with the fact that it just went platinum in Congo (40 copies sold). I’d tell you to go buy it, but if you are reading this you either have already or you’re a cheap f–k. Maybe a page out of Mel Gibson’s book could improve publicity for my CD or explain why it is not selling. Comedy, after all, is my Passion.