One of the most physically disgusting things I have ever done.

From Friday 9 pm thru Sunday at 11:45 pm I managed to watch the entire first season of the show Heroes. I have managed not to do too many disgusting things in my life, although some might say drinking a glass of milk with pancakes is disgusting, I register pretty normal on the scale of not doing disgusting things. I was not one of those kids that ate his own boogers, although in 5th grade I once did a shot of vinegar which stung pretty badly.

But watching 17 hours of TV in 48 hours is pretty disgusting. I usually watch about 17 hours a month. The fact that the people of America can AVERAGE 4-5 hours a day every day is appalling. I felt dumber, fatter and more apathetic after this marathon than I have ever felt in my life (except for March 2006 when I was literally fatter in lbs. than I ever have been). When I went for a walk as a break Sunday evening I felt like I had been in a cave for weeks. I think that is the main reason that television channels should stop using the phrase “marathon” to describe the least energetic, inspiring and athletic activity that someone can do. It is not a test of endurance or conviction to engage in a television marathon; it is an absence of those qualities. Engaging in a television marathon is a surrender, not an activity.

That said, I make an exception for marathons of The Wire, which is the greatest show in television history. Season 4 comes out on DVD on December 4th. Heroes is a good show, but it is not in the same class as the Wire. The only advantage Heroes has is that it has a Haitian character called, imaginatively “The Haitian.” He is also played by a guy named Jean-Louis. The world is almost ready for me to make my move.