Why is Mr. Burns playing lead guitar?

Last night I went to see AC/DC in concert. The audience largely resembled the crowd in the back of the bar in The Accused: mostly aggressive, dirty and loud white guys.

The show began with a soft core pornographic cartoon right into the new hit song “Rock N Roll Train” (as a friend pointed out to me about 2/3 of AC/DC songs have the word Rock in them and 4/5 of all their songs sound the same (I’m still a big fan, but got to admit the truth).

I realized quickly that unless I know an AC/DC song by heart I have no fu-king idea what lead singer Brian Johnson is saying (if the Grammies ever come out with the “Male Lead Vocal Battling Constipation Issues While Singing” I expect Brian Johnson to beat out Bruce Springsteen and Michael Bolton for the win.

Some other highlights:

– Seeing an arena filled with mostly guys who probably use the words “fag” and “gay” as often as they say “fu-k yeah” chant for Angus Young, the diminutive guitarist with Jimmy Hendrix’ fingers and Montgomery Burns’ body, to strip off his clothes.

– During Whole Lotta Rosie, a tribute to voluptuous women, a 60 foot inflated blonde emerged tapping her foot to the beat of the song and masturbating vigorously. And her nipple is also exposed. Only rock n roll can get away with that.

– I saw a row behind me at one point a mother with her teenage son, who had Down’s syndrome. I could make a mean joke about the simplicity of AC/DC’s songs right now, but I actually thought it was just a nice thing to see the concert providing enjoyment for all. Then I started laughing at the thought of the Mom trying to explain the 60 foot inflatable slut to her son.

In other comedy news I will be in Bethesda this Saturday – woo hoo. I also learned two days ago that a comic has been using one of my jokes a pick up line for girls in bars. He assured me that he has not used the joke on stage, but I feel like Steve Martin in Roxanne writing material for Rick Rossovich. Ladies you should really cite check your suitor’s witty lines.